Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Randomize
