she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Randomize
