Soap is not a condiment
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
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