once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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