Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
