dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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