I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
