so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
