I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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