I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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