You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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