cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
i've created a new STD.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize
