My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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