there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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