Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Randomize
