the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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