Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
