worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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