I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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