I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
