awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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