She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
