Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
