I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
