ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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