I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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