well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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