Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
