The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
