Say something about gay babies.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Randomize
