That's intense
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
