So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
