god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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