Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
