U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
