Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
