you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
it's great music for shaving your balls
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize
