I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
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running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
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she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
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