He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
