Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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