Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
my sisters under your porch take her home
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked