Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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