Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Randomize
