scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
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i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
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The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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