In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize
