why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything about him screamed your future.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize