we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years