just come out here and I will go home with you...
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.