There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
