My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize
