You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Rumble strips road head = magical
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize
